Why are relationships so difficult?
The art of living together
Relationship Life Coaching
RELATIONAL LIFE THERAPY®
Relational Life Coaching is a practice of connecting to others through empathy, vulnerability, and accountability.
It is based on the method of Terry Real of the Relational Life Institute, U.S.A. I am trained at his Institute and am part of an ongoing group of RLT therapists working directly with Terry Real.
How does Relational Life Therapy (RLT) work ?
I work with you to give you the confidence and ability to step out of the traditional roles that society often conditions you to follow, in order to create more harmonious relationships.
We live in a world where relationship skills are largely lacking. Unfortunately, our society and culture also create an environment that often deprives people of necessary relationship skills from childhood. Yet learning relationship tools and techniques is essential to maintaining an intimate partnership based on harmony, respect and trust.
Some people may be pressured to sacrifice their true inner desires and beliefs and assume roles deemed appropriate by society. If they fail to meet expectations, they may be criticized and blamed and feel guilt as a result.
Those who are most often perceived as dominant figures may be encouraged to engage in aggressive and defensive behaviors, often idolized in the cultural mainstream. Those who do not demonstrate these characteristics may be publicly labeled as weak. Because of these social pressures, some individuals may develop "masks" in order to "fit in" with society, and these masks may be present when they enter a relationship.
A happy and fulfilling relationship is largely a matter of learning!
"Intimacy isn’t something you have. It’s something you do"
Terry Real, Relational Life Institute, U.S.A.
There are several key differences between traditional couple psychotherapy and LTR:
- Traditional couples therapists may present themselves as experts in their field, while RLTs speak as imperfect people who are themselves in recovery.
- Traditional therapists tend not to address behaviors directly. Relational Life Therapists address issues and behaviors in a clear and direct manner, without shaming the person seeking help.
- A traditional therapist may choose not to confront people in treatment for fear that they will drop out of therapy. Relationship therapists may instead tell people in treatment that they will sometimes confront them in order to help them recover. I also encourage people to take decisive action, and in fact, in this method, we emphasize action.
- Traditional psychotherapists may try to make therapy more comfortable for troubled people so that they do not leave therapy. A relational therapist can instead make therapy as uncomfortable as possible for people who persist in their disruptive behavior.
Relationship skills can be learned
I encourage my clients to be assertive and learn the skills necessary to achieve intimacy, passion and unity. The long-term goal of Life Skills Therapy is to help people create productive environments where all relationships are valued, balanced and based on equality and mutual respect.